Im joking really, im an audiophile myself with a decent hi fi set up that cost a few thousand dollars.
However, there is a subset of audiophiles that completely perplexes me. It just seems to me that at some stage, its no longer audiophilia (love of sound) but rather, some kind of neuroses where you have to control and make whatever you hear ‘pure’ or whatever it is. I worked in a psych ward years ago, and some of the stuff schizoprenics would say (about things being impure and such) echo alot of what I hear obsessive audiophiles say sometimes.
For example, theres audiophiles that would buy stuff like this:
https://www.toys4vip.com/en/luxury-toy/turntable/
A $133,000 turntable hooked up to a power conditioner, just so they can play a vinyl. I mean, this is fucking crazy right?
What you failed to mention in your rant was that turntable (designed by a NASA scientist genius who does space stuff you could never even comprehend) has a sound-damping plate suspended on a unique axis that eliminates micro-oscillations while the microprocessor controls the elimination of noise, ensuring a pristine sound without hissing.